Natural Rest, the book

NaturalRest-Heart8

Scott Kiloby’s book, Natural Rest is due out any day now. Fred Davis has written a lengthy and wonderful post about it on his blog, Awakening Clarity. Fred also has a book out on addiction and recovery, Beyond Recovery. Addiction and non-duality appear to be natural, inevitable philosophical bedfellows.

Everyone has an addiction. ~ Scott Kiloby

Next weekend is the premiere Freedom from Compulsion Intensive in Dallas. Unfortunately, I will be unable to attend due to family health emergencies that require that I be near the phone these days. Julianne Eanniello and Deena Wade will be there with Scott, introducing the CI to a small and intimate group of participants. I’m looking forward to hearing all about the event, and expect great things from these 3 folks.

If you were unable to make it to the Dallas Compulsion Intensive, there is still time to sign up for the Boulder Freedom from Compulsion Intensive, to be held in March. Hope to see many of you there.

Let freedom ring. ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

Getting Older is not a Future Proposition

Time-PhotoAn acquaintance recently suggested that the inquiries might be useful in regard to aging, a looking into what to do as we confront the challenges of growing older. Great idea. As facilitators we regularly offer a body identification inquiry, and of course there can be a general sense of deficiency when we start to experience the limitations that we are culturally conditioned to believe are part and parcel of heading into the second half of life. “I can’t do this anymore” is a common lament, a general theme. As we age, everywhere we go, we look around and are startled to discover we are the oldest people in the room. The world appears to be getting younger faster. It’s like being on a train that’s headed in the opposite direction from all other trains, that are going the other way at an accelerated speed. Yet we are slowing down and headed back to the station where the journey began, looking out the windows at the scenery we passed by seemingly just yesterday, but was it really so long ago?

My 83 year-old mother suffered a massive stroke this weekend. My father seems more at risk of dying than she, because he has no idea how to take care of himself. These these last few days he has looked like a vision of terror, like an abandoned child. So what to do?

It is so clear that, as simple as it sounds, there is never a time of life where the central issue is not the capacity to live in the present moment. Whereas the idea of using the inquiries to address the aging mind and body initially appeared to be about the most obvious concepts of physical limitations and mental sluggishness, I now see that it’s an ageless, timeless, genderless, collective concern. Are we living in a world of regret or nostalgia, or the terror or hope of what’s down the road? Or can we be fully present in this momentliterally, abandon all preoccupation with what was, or what is to come?

My father has almost literally left his mind and body out of sheer terror. His waking nightmare has always had to do with a dire future. He is a master of worst case scenarios, and is continually living in those movies as if they are real and true right now.  My mother is resting and healing, and seemingly has a better quality of life in comparison to the horror show my father appears to be living in. Right now, it appears as if he needs drugs more than she, just to get through the day. I do not tell my father to be here now (only once, gently.) I show him how to do the laundry and find affection for simple things, like how that sock still looks like the foot it so recently covered. My mother is physically incapacitated on most of the left side of her body, from her face down to her toes. She cannot, for the moment, go anywhere or do anything, as most of us feel we must, most of the time, so she rests without compulsion, without his debilitating agitation.

If I lived in the future, I might look at these two and think, “This is our fate,” this slowing down, this incapacitation, the whole spectacle of death and dying. You don’t have to see my mother’s immobilized, slackened body in the hospital bed to know or suspect this possibility. But I might just hear my father’s starkly panicked voice over the phone in regard to an uncertain and dismal future–and just stop.

Stop all movements toward any other moment but this. No matter what your age in years, just stop all thought of an imagined bleak, or better-than-this future. Relinquish all ties, debts, and lingering resentments about an equally imagined past, right now. This is the paramount opportunity of a lifetime, because we are never really old or young outside of the present moment.

Scott Kiloby’s upcoming book about addiction, Natural Rest, has the simple yet profound prescription to rest, simply rest, into this present moment. Rest, right now, with what is. It is the age-old admonition to be here now. We can come up with all kinds of inquiries to deal with all kinds of apparent “problems.” But there has never been a better time, nor will there ever be, to live from this universal axiomatic truth in regard to surrendering all to the present moment. What else is there?

This is it; this moment. I sing this song to myself. No one or nothing from the past or the future can hear it. But the melody lingers sweetly.

 

Experience Freedom First-Hand; A New Paradigm.

We have 2 preliminary Freedom From Compulsion Intensives lined up for January, 2013. The first is in Boulder, Colorado, the weekend of January4th-6th, at Prajna Studio. The second is in Dallas, Texas, the weekend of January 25th-27th, at the Connective Hub.

These 2 intensives will be unique in that there will only be 20 seats available, with 2 Facilitators. Scott Kiloby and I will be giving hands-on attention in a small group setting, with 10 participants for each facilitator. Because it’s a test, or beta group, the fee is reduced for these 2 ground-breaking weekends only.

This is a unique opportunity, with limited seating available, to get in on the ground floor of an inquiry that, based on our experience thus far, is setting people free in so many ways.

Last week at the Science and Non Duality conference (SAND), there were many truly amazing speakers, and a great deal of clarity in evidence. It was noted, however, that the format of a teacher sitting in front of a group of seekers, is still the primary mode of passing along the dharma, so to speak. In my experience, both as a facilitator, and as one who participated in satsangs, this, or any understanding of this, cannot be gleaned through passively sitting and listening to someone else telling you what it looks and feels like. All too often, this can lead to the unquestioned assumption that it is the teacher that knows, that abides “there,” which can lead to more less-than, and not-there-yet assumptions; thus more satsangs, and more seeking. These intensives are designed to promote an experiential seeing, or knowing, in contrast to the dualistic paradigm of a teacher imparting testimony to a student. We’re offering a new paradigm that levels outdated distinctions between teacher and seeker, whereby second-hand knowledge is translated into first-hand experience.

Yes, there will be the two of us facilitating, but talking about what this is about will be kept to a minimum. Experiencing it for yourself, as your Self, is the intention. But that’s just in relation to seeking, which is only one observed, beneficial impact of the CI. Not everyone is seeking enlightenment. Some just want to get through the day without drinking, popping pills, eating another slice of pie, or gambling away their life savings.

In our experience of working with others using the CI, it has been consistently observed that loss of compulsion in one area of life leads to the falling away of compulsion in general. If your life feels compromised or constrained by a compulsive behavior—the need to do something, be with someone, or ingest something to feel better, come see what freedom feels like without that compulsion.

Again, seating is limited, and we had people already signed up, for Boulder and for Dallas, even before we officially made a widespread announcement to the general public. Class size and the price of admission will most likely go up for future intensives, though it will always be kept to no more than 10 participants per facilitator. Come join us for the Freedom From Compulsive Intensive, and see for yourself what this freedom thing is all about. Register now at ScottKilobytalks.com.

Here’s a taste, a testimony, from a session yesterday:

Just had a food CI with Colette.

One little word to trigger the story.

Safe.

One 46 yr old memory.

Colette pulling things apart.

Mind trying to keep thoughts, images and sensations glued together to create a dramatic story & sense of self.

Not enough impetus to hold it together.

The story ended in laughter.

Thank you, Colette!
Now, there’s one less groove in this old record. ~ Kari S.

The Compulsion Inquiry~Self as Contraction, Manifesting as Compulsion

Over at Living Realization, we’ve been working on a new form of inquiry specifically designed to address addiction and compulsive behavior. It’s called the Compulsion Inquiry (CI). Scott Kiloby’s book on addiction, Natural Rest, will be out in a few months, and all is revealed expertly there, so without going into a lengthy description here, there is an aspect that is of particular interest in regard to the unfindable self.

In brief, first we look for the command to use, or engage in the compulsive behavior, in images, words, and bodily sensations. For instance, the image of a cigarette, or even the cigarette itself—Where is there a command to smoke in either the image or even the cigarette in your hand? We go through all possible associations with the behavior, even looking at a clock, the place where the behavior occurs, and other triggers, like smoking with a morning cup of coffee. No command can be found anywhere.

Then it can be seen that when an urge or a craving arises, there is an almost fleeting, flash image of the act itself, like a “ghost image” of the activity already happening. When this image is seen, really looked at, prior to using, the craving miraculously seems to disappear, or is simply forgotten.

In addition to looking for the command, it is usually the case that when someone attempts to curb any form of compulsive behavior or addiction, there is often a period of abstention that is achieved, in part, by a subtle but often unconscious agreement made to use or engage in the behavior in the future. There is usually an image of the behavior—we actually see ourselves doing it—but more importantly, there is also a physical sensation that is associated with this promise we make to ourselves. It is similar to a barely noticeable relaxation that happens when, for instance, we have come to a decision about something. For most, the discovery of this point of relaxation is a discovery of the sweetest peace imaginable. This is not a fleeting experience engendered by a substance or activity, this peace. This relaxation response is the natural state, hence the title, Natural Rest. It is the complete allowance, complete agreement with what is experienced physically, and this allowance, this rest, is not dependent upon anything external—no substance, no activity required—nor is it something to seek for in the future. It’s right here, right now, always. It is the experience of the end of seeking.

“…feelings and good times are temporary energies. They arise and fall, providing no ultimate or final relief. This question is asking what you’re ultimately seeking from the thing. This requires you to look a little deeper. Beyond the experience of temporary energies such as pleasure, something else happens when you attain what you’re seeking: The seeking energy relaxes for a moment. As that energy dies, presence reveals itself naturally. Present rest is synonymous with peace and contentment.” ~ Scott Kiloby, Natural Rest

The point of relaxation reveals that the self is often felt as a barely perceptible bodily contraction. People can have the clearest seeing of no self, of oneness, yet this contraction remains or recurs, albeit slightly to barely detectable. Thus, there can be great clarity, but forms of compulsion persist.

“…there is a core type of grasping…it is our most rudimentary sense of self…It is that grasping and contracting around which all the other senses of self are constructed…awakening is the sudden releasing of this grasping in the gut. There’s no guarantee that the grasping will stay released; it may grab hold again.” ~ Adyashanti

“The body is a warehouse in which all our hurts, rejections, failures, fears and resentments are stored, long after thinking has forgotten them…It is these layers of tension and contraction that obscure the natural transparency and openness of the body and give the impression that a separate, inside self is in residence…These may be dormant much of the time but may also be triggered for irrational reasons at unexpected times, and betray in us, over and over again, the residues of a separate inside self.” Rupert Spira

Thus far, in our limited trials using the CI, feedback seems to indicate that this innate physiological grasping is at the root of compulsive behavior. The unconscious grasp within produces grasping, seeking without. Beyond the implications of reducing, if not completely eradicating compulsive and addictive behavior, it has been reported and experienced as an overall diminishment of this sense of a separate self. With the relaxation of this contraction, overall compulsion and the sense of separation relax as well.

Addiction then, could be viewed as a significant portal not only to the recognition of the residual self that remains (in theory), as well as the dissolution of both the behavior, and the root of its persistence. The Compulsion Inquiry is a radical approach to recovery. The good news is, the impact of this work goes far beyond the curbing of addiction and release from compulsive behaviors. It potentially reveals, and subsequently undermines, the sense of separation at its core.